Singapore Declares War on Food Influencers, Citing Public Safety Risk

The Ministry of Food Scarcity (MFS) has announced a new mandatory certification for all food content creators: the ‘Influencer Intensity Index’ (III). This comes after a shocking spike in public gastric distress caused by witnessing overly enthusiastic filming techniques. "The way some of these people poke the char siew, man, it’s barbaric," commented a MFS spokesperson. Penalties for failing to achieve a minimum ‘Mouth-to-Lens’ ratio will result in immediate suspension from all hawker centres, effectively banishment from the nation's spiritual core. One local influencer, Brenda, whose signature move involves 45 seconds of slow-motion noodles being lifted, lamented, "Aiyo, how to get views if I cannot act like I never eat for three days? KNN!" Authorities insist this is purely for public safety and to curb the proliferation of ‘Soggy Satay Syndrome’ caused by excessive B-roll footage. The new directive means only truly deserving (and potentially starving) individuals can now review the nation's beloved culinary offerings.