Singapore Residents Dismantle Own Roofs To Prove Condo ‘Beyond Economical Repair’

The “En-bloc fever” sweeping Singapore has entered its terminal phase at Pine Grove Towers, where residents were spotted yesterday using sledgehammers to systematically destroy their own load-bearing pillars. The objective is simple: convince the Strata Titles Board that the building is a structural liability to fast-track a $2.5 billion collective sale.

Local resident Tan Ah Kow was seen jubilantly flooding his living room with seawater to accelerate rebar corrosion. “Wah lau, you see this crack? I use jackhammer one. Last time small leak only, now whole balcony falling down. If the building look like warzone, developer surely buy fast-fast right? Huat ah!”

Property experts suggest this “scorched earth” strategy is the new industry standard. “Everywhere also en-bloc craze,” noted agent Gary Lim. “They don't care about shelter, only the windfall. Last night I saw one uncle trying to bribe termites to eat his parquet. Steady poipi!”