God Of Fortune Caught Betting On Toto To Afford Singapore's $200k COEs

In a city so expensive even deities are defaulting on their HDB loans, the God of Fortune was seen queuing at Singapore Pools.

Apparently, the divine treasury in heaven has been completely depleted by the latest GST hike and the cost of maintaining a private jet.

He was spotted meticulously shading "System 7" numbers, hoping to secure enough capital to pay for a miserable 3-room BTO in Tengah.

Witnesses say the immortal being looked visibly distressed while checking the current market price of a plate of Cai Fan with fish.

Desperate Sinkies in the queue reportedly asked him for tips, only to be told that even divine providence is no match for the house edge.

Singapore Pools confirmed that the God will still pay the full 9% tax on winnings because even the Almighty cannot escape the grasp of the taxman.

The deity later clarified that "insider trading" is impossible because the Toto machine is more rigged than a local town council election.