National Service Singapore Now Training Recruits To Shoot At Air, Say Experts

SINGAPORE — Amidst dwindling real-world threats, the Singapore Armed Forces (SAF) has reportedly escalated its commitment to operational readiness by introducing ‘Hyper-Realistic Decoy Intruder Drills’ (HRDID). These drills, designed to test recruits' reactions to threats that aren't actually there, have become so realistic that participants are now being treated for phantom fatigue.

Sources confirm the SAF now deploys highly convincing holographic 'Intruder Targets'—often appearing as particularly slow-moving sergeants or exceptionally well-rested corporals—to trigger full-scale urban warfare simulations in training areas.

“We need the boys sharp, man. If you cannot handle a ghost intruder, how you going to handle the *real* ghost?” stated Sergeant Major Lim, polishing his monocle. “Last week, one recruit cried for his Mummy after shooting a particularly convincing shadow. *Steady lah*, means the training effective.”

Recruits, however, are less enthused. “*Eh, KNN, my heart almost stop!*” complained Private Chua, nursing a sprained ankle from diving behind a potted plant. “They say, ‘Intruder! Shoot to kill!’ Then the thing dissolve. Now I scared of dust bunnies, I tell you.” Experts suggest this relentless pursuit of threat simulation is ensuring Singapore’s manpower remains perfectly prepared for conflicts against non-existent enemies.