Porsche Partners With ITE To Teach Poor Sinkies Expensive Smells

In a move to finally bridge the gap between "living in a rental flat" and "world-class tax evasion," Porsche has partnered with ITE to ensure students can properly identify the exact leather scent of a mid-life crisis.

The new curriculum focuses on "Advanced Hubcap Polishing for Elites" and "How to Discreetly Clean Champagne Vomit from a Macan."

While BYD’s new 1,500kW super-charger can fill a battery in five minutes, experts suggest it is primarily designed to vaporize any technician who tries to charge a second-hand Chery.

"Wah piang, I touch the steering wheel only, the German instructor ask me why my hand so coarse," remarked one student. "He say if I don’t use expensive moisturizer, the Porsche will start crying like one small girl."