Singapore Government Tries Turning Sinkies Off And On Again To Fix Breeding

The Singapore government has officially announced a "Parenthood Reset," which is the political equivalent of blowing into a dusty Nintendo cartridge and hoping for a miracle.

Minister Indranee Rajah, who has successfully avoided the sticky-fingered hellscape of parenthood herself, suggested that citizens simply "reimagine" their lives without crushing financial debt.

Officials believe that if Sinkies just press the "Reset" button hard enough, the 0.87 fertility rate will magically transform into a healthy surplus of future Grab drivers.

"We’ve tried baby bonuses and free diapers; now we’re trying raw gaslighting," whispered one anonymous official while polishing his GCB gate.

Young couples responded by scheduling their next mental breakdowns in slightly more luxurious VivoCity toilet cubicles.

Apparently, "resetting" marriage is much easier than lowering the price of a BTO that costs more than a private jet.

If the birth rate doesn't improve, the state will simply replace children with more productive, non-whiny AI drones.